A night of sheer excitement, joy for the most part, shock to almost everything that we witnessed, and enthusiasm for it is the time to unwind from the stressful part of life. Almost as it seems that it is the perfect night to be happy and all but it really isn't.
For the night needs to be rearranged, conflicts have to be resolved, things can't stay the same. As hopeful as I have made you feel for the day, I let you down. For I thought that we'd be together, I left you hanging. For I broke that sweet smile of yours, I am sorry, I didn't mean to hurt that special girl. I know its my neglect that made that smile fall away to the weight of the heavy world. For all the things you thought didn't work as the way you planned it to be. Sincere apologies may never be enough for it is nothing but mere words, for me writing my thoughts as into this blog means nonsense as these are nothing but mere words. Every word written in this entry is not as thought up in anyway as you may think. This is the moment wherein I'm in a trance, wherein I let what I feel do the writing. Every letter in the words that compose the paragraphs of this blog asks for an apology of such sincerity.
As I am immobilized by the thought of you, paralyzed by the sight of you, hypnotized by the words you say, I am crushed by the hate you bring. Strangely as I contradict myself in some way, it is never hard to stay with you for everyday is nothing for I don't mind to do. Deserting such fair maiden is not in my intention in anyway but the fact still remains it had been done intentionally or not, I must be in fault. For you have gone so far away, neither my words nor my calls can reach you anymore, you have become the maiden that I can't find. Maybe the chance to find you right now is impossible but nothing remains the same forever so I'll seek for any place you may have lock yourself into. Tomorrow or not, that smile of pure sweetness will appear like those dimples on your cheeks show whenever you are happy. The broken smile that I have created is a crime committed in the highest felony and for that I owe you big time and I plan to pay for it just to fix that elegance of yours.
ainzley
2011
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